I love line dancing. It's like a moving meditation because you have to focus only in the moment and on what your feet are doing. Its also a lot of fun and great exercise. We learn a new dance or two every lesson. I was pondering the fact that some dancers learn faster than others. For some it's as if they were born to dance. Others have to work hard at it. Some struggle to master rhythm. Others are the rhythm from the outset. One thing however we all have in common, is that each of us, as an individual, must learn the dance for ourselves. No one can learn for us. We have to learn the steps and move our bodies in harmony with the music. If one person goes left when everyone else turns right clashes and chaos ensues.
It's the same in life. We must take responsibility for our actions. We must decide what we want and work towards that goal. We cannot set goals for others neither can we achieve goals for them. We are all masters of our own destiny in that respect. How is it then that co-dependency arises? How come some attempt to 'carry' others when that is impossible? How is it that some give way too much even though their gestures of support and help are never reciprocated? How is that people self sacrifice unnecessarily? How is it that the families of addicts enable the addict by over compensating and often by trying to hide the destructive behavior from others to protect social standing? How come the victims of abuse are often blamed by their perpetrators? How come rape victims who tell the truth, often suffer more than their rapist?
Can you imagine a world where we all took personal responsibility, stopped expecting others to do stuff for us, stopped the entitlement mindset and exchanged inter-dependence for co-dependence? Where we looked inside for our shadow side's motivation and owned it, instead of blaming others and using scapegoats?
I believe we would all achieve more.
Do you agree?